As you know, I am on a quest to improve my health and self esteem through diet and exercise. The exercise part is going pretty well because I actually enjoy moving around, especially outdoors. Eating right is tougher for me. I have found there are eating “seasons” which derail my best laid diet plans. I divide the year into seasons based on what kinds of sweets are available.
The first season of the year is the Valentine candy season. Now, I’m also cheap so I usually wait until the day after the holiday when all the candy is 50 percent off. That way, I reason, I can get twice as much for the same price. A good deal, right? The fun part about buying Valentine candy is getting the really enormous heart-shaped box of chocolates. The not so fun part is downing the entire box in a frenzied attempt to destroy the evidence. (Good thing I don’t do that very often.)
Right after that comes Girl Scout cookie season. Curse those diabolical minions of fund raising! If I happen to be lucky enough to escape their door-to-door pitch, they entrap me at the grocery store entrance. “Hi! Would you like to buy a box of Girl Scout cookies?” Who can resist their chirping little voices and their chipper little attitudes? They put the Thin Mints up front on purpose. Like a magnet the box pulls me in a sweeping arc from the grocery store door right up to their little table. I know I shouldn’t blame the little darlings for my own lack of will power. But couldn’t they sell something less detrimental to our health? Like pencils?
The next season is Easter candy season. I love marshmallow Peeps. I am a bit of a Peep snob. To me, a REAL Peep is yellow and bird-shaped. They should not be allowed at any other time of year. And the only other color they should come in is pink. I refuse to eat pumpkin Peeps or Christmas tree Peeps or purple Peeps or any other type of Peep. The original is best. Again, I wait for the candy sale. Last year I found a store selling a box of four for 10 cents. Peep season is right around the corner. (Just say no. Just say no.)
Summertime offers no reprieve from the sweet season diet destroyer. My birthday is in the summer so every year I insist on an ice cream cake. It must have lots of flowers on it in the kind of icing that stains your teeth blue, or purple, or whatever color the flowers are. The saving grace about ice cream cakes is they are usually expensive so we get a small one.
Autumn brings Halloween. While I don’t usually participate in this so-called holiday (my husband’s birthday is on Halloween) I do participate in the after Halloween candy sale. I’m not the only one on a feeding frenzy during this time either. Plenty of other women my age (why is it always women?) are gathered around that display at the grocery store. My favorite sweet is Autumn Mix. I love those little candy pumpkins. I eat them the same way every time – bit off the green stem first then finish off the rest. As with Peeps I’m loyal to one specific brand of this candy.
Christmas brings cookies of every kind which are appropriate to eat only during this time of year. The one cookie no one makes any more are the press cookies, I think they are called “Spritz” cookies. My mom made these a lot and I just loved them. Just about any Christmas cookie is great except for the uninspired varieties like chocolate chip or brownies. Why bother with a cookie you can have any time of year?
There you have my year of eating seasons. I should call it my “year of eating dangerously.” Somehow “year of eating fruits, vegetables, and lean protein” doesn’t appeal to my sense of adventure.
